Can broken friendships come back?
Restored relationships give us perspective on our experiences, and deepen our lives. Not all friendship fissures are fatal. If you have a long lost friendship you'd like to rekindle, chances are you'll be able to make a meaningful reconnection.
Even when one half of a friendship does something seemingly unforgivable (hooks up with your ex, for instance), it's still possible to reconcile if both sides are willing to put in the work.
- Reflect and write down the good. Before you face a difficult conversation with a friend, pause and reflect. ...
- Choose a different way to communicate. ...
- Give it time and try again. ...
- Shuffle the “friendship furniture” ...
- Follow the red flags.
- The friendship is consistently one-sided. ...
- They betray your trust. ...
- They don't keep your secrets. ...
- They are overly negative and pessimistic. ...
- You have little or nothing to talk about. ...
- They create or attract drama. ...
- They are passive-aggressive when you say "no" to them. ...
- They dismiss it when you raise a concern.
Reviving a friendship is totally possible, so don't give up on your friend. It's normal for friendships to change over time, but sometimes change is a good thing. Your friendship might even come back stronger than it was before! Reach out to your friend so you can start reconnecting.
The most significant factors in ending a friendship were discovered to be, broadly, selfishness, being more likely to end friendships with those who looked after their own interest, were not supportive of them, were dishonest, and were taking without giving, among the prime reasons.
Ask yourself if your friend uplifts and supports you, or if they're a constant drain on your mental and emotional energy. If you feel negative and down on yourself whenever you're around this person, the friendship might not be worth fixing. Think about the last few instances you spent time with this person.
The friendship has grown toxic
One 2021 study notes that some signs a friendship has grown toxic include: you feel anxiety prior to meeting up with your friend. your friend encourages unwanted or unhealthy habits. your friend acts in ways that hurt your self-esteem, like mocking you.
- Consider why you did it. Before you embark on the process of rebuilding trust, you'll first want to check in with yourself to understand why you did it. ...
- Apologize sincerely. ...
- Give your partner time. ...
- Let their needs guide you. ...
- Commit to clear communication.
- Take a leap of faith and make that first move to reconnect. ...
- Ask to meet up in person. ...
- Address the issue early on in the conversation. ...
- Own up to your faults. ...
- Find new commonalities.
What to do when you ruined your friendship?
- Open up about your feelings. No one can understand your feelings if you never talk about them— even if they are your best friends for years. ...
- Do apologize. We make mistakes. ...
- Give them some time. ...
- Listen to their opinions. ...
- Reminisce. ...
- See the changes.
The final stage, post-friendship, occurs after a friendship has been terminated.

“Ghosting” – simply ceasing to communicate with a person without explaining why – allows people to avoid difficult conversations and simply phase a friend out of their life. “I think it's a lot to do with how we communicate now,” says Marianne, 46. “Face-to-face screaming rows don't tend to happen.
- Take a leap of faith and make that first move to reconnect. ...
- Ask to meet up in person. ...
- Address the issue early on in the conversation. ...
- Own up to your faults. ...
- Find new commonalities.
Even though you might feel that it's going to be nearly impossible, you can rekindle your lost friendship. All you need to do is contact your friend, get together, and rebuild the relationship.
There is no specific timeline for a break. You might just want a week to clear your head, or you might decide to put things on hold for a year while one of you travels. It depends on the individual situation.
If they do not pick up, leave a short message letting them know that you care for them and are available whenever they are ready to talk. If calling them does not seem like a great option, send them an email or text conveying the same message. Refrain from overwhelming your friend with phone calls and messages.
Fixing a friendship is usually worth the time and effort. Communication and expressing yourself are essential in cultivating a great relationship, and human relationships are really a true source of happiness.
- Try To Expand Old Interests. ...
- Go Beyond Social Media. ...
- 3. ... But Use Technology To Bond. ...
- Make It Clear You're Making Time For Them. ...
- Establish New Traditions. ...
- Have Honest Conversations About Old Patterns. ...
- Integrate Them Into New Groups. ...
- Make Room For Their Changed Circumstances.